The verdict? It is a giant iPhone. In fact it is a giant iPhone that weighs the same as a heavy hardback book (a heavy hardback book that, thanks to the curved back of the iPad, cannot be used on a flat surface), with a touch-screen so glossy that once you’ve got over the shock of seeing the stupid expressions your face makes whilst web browsing, you’ll be too scared to touch the impeccably shiny screen through fear of leaving incriminating fingerprints that could be used to trace your sordid web-browsing history.

Nope, the iPad is not for me, in fact Charlie Brooker’s launch day article sums up my feelings towards it in a manner that my slowly degrading GCSE grade C English will never be able to articulate. Despite my comparative lack of words we come to the same conclusion – you will want to own an iPad, but only when it becomes lighter and cheaper.